Amaryllis sillyramA

Well, she’s not really a baby any more. She’s two! And two months! Plus some weeks! And walking and talking. She still gets a few things mixed up, in grammar and pronunciation, of course.

Pronunciation: esses at the beginnings of words somehow end up at the ends of the words. Snow is noe-s. That’s the most common one — we’ve seen a lot of snow this year — and right now I can’t think of any other examples of the moved S.

Grammar (and the reason for this post): she hasn’t completely sorted out what you and me mean, and sometimes just says it as she hears it. So if you ask her, “Want me to read you a story?” She’ll say, “Read you a story.” Or if you ask her, “Want me to carry you?” She’ll say, “Carry you.” And in fact, now when she wants to be carried, or really just to go where I am going or go where her daddy is going, then unprompted, she’ll hold out her arms and say “Muriel carry you.”

Except it doesn’t come out sounding like “Muriel carry you.” It sounds much more like “Muriel kill you.” And with the outstretched arms… it makes us laugh every time.

All part of the ninja baby training.

From The Sneeze:

February 13, 2009
Stevie’s Home! (My Traditional Valentine’s Love Tip)

A long time ago when my wife was my girlfriend and we were LIVING IN SIN, a tradition was born. I’d like to now share it with you all.

I came home from work one day and found her in front of the computer. I said “Hello,” and she barely grunted back. I don’t even think she looked up.

Half-jokingly I responded, “Okay, we’re gonna try this again.” I walked out the front door and came back in a few moments later…

“STEVIE’S HOME, STEVIE’S HOME!!! YAY!!!” was the new over-the-top cheer I was greeted with. It was accompanied by a hug and kisses. And I loved it.

What began as a joke quickly became an ongoing practice that continues to this day in our house: The person who is home first must make a small fuss when the other person gets there.

Does it sound silly? Yes. Do I promise that it will set the tone for a nicer evening just about every time you do it? Yes.

The world is full of douchebags, guys. Take 3 seconds out of your precious day to make a fuss over each other. Do it like you mean it. Do it as a goof. Just do it a lot.

I’m promise you’ll be glad you did.

(For those who’d prefer to cleanse their palette of the preceding sweetness, the following profanity has been provided for your convenience: [your favorite swear here].)

OH. We are so doing this.

64,068: that’s what the quit meter says right now. M & I quit smoking five years ago, as of Groundhog Day. FIVE YEARS WOO HOO!! 64,000 cigarettes not smoked! And we’ve not spent almost $20,000 — and that’s at five-years-ago prices. Dizzam.